Well, it's not a shampoo bottle now!

Now that I've calmed down, I would like to discuss the rest of the Oscars. And today I'm too lazy and distracted to post a bunch of pictures you've already seen before elsewhere, so if you want visuals, click here (I figure if you are taking the time to read this, you've probably already seen their outfits anyway).

So, first of all, I loved Hugh Jackman. He made me laugh and it wasn't at how bad he was. I usually hate the hosts of these things. Was he corny?; absolutely! Did he seem kinda gay?; well, you know I'd rather sit on my lips than judge someone, but I think it's doubtful that he'd score a 0 on the Kinsey scale. But he's definitely not alone in that fact. There is no denying Hugh's likability, and I think everybody was rooting for him to do well, and he delivered. My favorite part of the opening number was "The Reader". As far as his duet with Anne Hathaway; well, that went a little too far on the cornball scale, even for me.

Another thing I liked: the old people announcing the nominees. It definitely had a sorority/fraternity feel (not that I would know from personal experience, but I've watched enough Beverly Hills, 90210 to be an honorary Alpha) and I found myself tearing up. I thought it was a nice consolation for the losers, because you can't feel that bad about yourself when Shirley Maclaine just told you how awesome you were.
So, otherwise:

1) I'm happy Heath Ledger won. His family spoke beautifully and it gave me a case of the sads.

2) Did anybody else think that Penny Cruz was speaking Spanish for the first half of her speech until she calmed down and announced that she would be saying something in Spanish?

3) Thank God, no one got the horrible orchestra send-off during the middle of their speech. I always worry about those people for the rest of the night; I know I'm the exception in this regard, but I think if people wait their whole life for this, they should get their two minutes or however long they need.

4) If I have to see any more clips of Frost/Nixon I think I'm going to go find Frank Langella and gouge his eyes out. I don't understand why everybody loves him so much. He creeps me out.

5) One of the documentaries was called Smile, Pinki!; it actually won. This made me giggle uncontrollably because I call my mom Pinky and it just made me laugh. Well, then I found out that it is a movie about people getting Cleft Pallate surgeries. Way to bring a girl down, Oscars.

6) These things are too damn long. Can't we just have another ceremony for all the boring crap? Or add some of this boring crap to the boring crap that Jessica Biel (who looked terrible by the way) hosted?

7) Oh, Kate. I feel like I know you. I wish I did. I just want to come drink tea and eat crumpets with you. Can I be your Nanny? I want to come live in London. Your speech was corny; you were definitely meant to be an actress; I just love you. I should probably go see one of your movies now.

8) When I was in NYC last year, Mr. Bunny and I had this ridiculous night where we walked all the way to the Empire State Building in the rain and then had a terrible time there because it was an overpriced tourist trap and under construction and windy. Anyway, after all that, all I wanted was to get in a cab and go back to the hotel. Well we couldn't find one, so we got in one of those rickshaw/pedicab things. And the pedicab guy was this really nice Canuck who reminded me of Steve Zahn. He's pedaling along and we're a couple blocks off of Broadway on a back street with several bars. I'm looking around the mostly empty street while Mr. Bunny and Canuck Zahn are discussing music or Canada or something and all of a sudden, I see a man walking alone. He is quite famous and I'm starstruck.

I turned into Ariel and couldn't speak--literally couldn't find my voice. Not that I would have said anything to him (I'm scared he would punch me in the face. I'm not gonna lie-this guy scares the ever loving crap out of me) but to get Mr. Bunny's attention. I'm also pretty much paralyzed and the only thing that's moving are my eyeballs, which are following the star as he crosses the street. The only other part of my body that wasn't paralyzed was my arm, which I was continually punching my husband with. I finally hit Mr. Bunny enough times that he looked over at me inquisitively, and I used my one working limb to point at the man who played Spicoli; the first Mr. Madonna; and the man who would go on to portray Harvey Milk. Mr. Bunny follows my arm and my gaze and looks over. I find my voice to whisper "It's Sean Penn!" and Mr. Bunny looks at him again and says "You think?" He then looks back at us and smirks. And it was the trademark Sean Penn smirk.

So I've always loved Sean Penn but have loved him a little bit more since last April. And even though Mr. Bunny is still not convinced that the man we saw was Sean Penn, I know it was him because of that smirk. And I'm so glad that Sean has gotten back with Robin Wright Penn since then, because I was worried that we saw him as he tried to drown his sorrows. I thought Sean was incredible as Harvey Milk and loved the whole cast of the movie; I think it is such an important subject and such an interesting film. I'm glad he won--although I would have been happy for Mickey Rourke to win (maybe a little bit more happy because he makes me giggle and I loved The Wrestler). But when Sean got up on stage and said "You Commie Homo-Loving SOBs" I giggled and was glad that my Dad had gone to bed. His speech was poignant and made me happy that he won.

9) And finally, I would like to say how happy I am that Slumdog won Best Picture. I would also like to say that I really want to adopt an Indian child. They are so beautiful and sweet. I bet you Brangelina's next baby will be from India.

What did you think? What did you like, what did you hate?

Who do you think should win best and worst dressed?

I'll be sharing my thoughts on the fashion tomorrow.

Have a great day!

Love,

Elle Bunny